I fired myself. Should you?

How to know when it’s time to leave your job

About 10 years into my career, I left my well-paying corporate job to start my own marketing consulting business. A new CEO had just joined the company and I was feeling burned out and bitter from what had been a very toxic culture under the old CEO (my boss at the time). I instinctively knew that it was time for me to try something new and time for the company to replace me with a fresh leader who would have less baggage.

In other words, I fired myself.

I had never quit a job without having another one to go to and I remember it feeling a lot like being on a roller coaster – the part where you are at the top, right about to start the steep descent down and you think to yourself: “am I insane?”

Luckily it all worked out. I had my first contract within a month and I ran a successful business for more than 10 years. Don’t get me wrong, it was hard work and there were some difficult times along the way, but being my own boss allowed me to really stretch myself and better balance my work with raising two young boys. It was one of the most rewarding times in my career.

As we emerge from the pandemic, many of us are reimagining what our work and life can look like in this new era. Maybe we don't have to continue pushing through the things that have been making us so stressed and unfulfilled – a grinding daily commute, a work culture that doesn’t fit with our values or a job where we have become stagnant. Maybe we’re just tired of waiting for the promotion that never seems to come.

So what if the bravest thing we can do right now is to quit? This is the question explored by the New York Times’ Lindsay Crouse in a thought-provoking video. According to Crouse, powering through a situation that no longer serves us well is actually more passive than we think because we are "cheating ourselves out of future (and likely better) opportunities."

How do you know if it’s time to fire yourself? Here are four red flags that told me it was time for an exit strategy:

1. I didn’t like who I had become

While I loved my role and so many of the people I worked with, my boss at the time was not a transparent leader who instilled trust across the leadership team. For example, he discouraged me from being “too collaborative” with my global counterparts and he was not forthcoming about what was happening across the company. As a result, I became adept at secretly sussing out the information I needed to do my job and constantly watching my back. This made me less open and honest with my colleagues which meant I had to swallow my values often. In the end, I felt that I had to leave my job just to find myself again. Ask yourself: are you being asked to compromise who you are at your core to do your job?

2. My learning curve had hit a dead end

When I was hired, I was given the task of building an entire function and department from scratch which was both exciting and challenging. But after nearly two years of putting all the pieces in place, I was ready for another big leap. Unfortunately, the new CEO had other ideas for me and my department. I saw few opportunities to continue to grow and develop in a way that would fulfill me. Sometimes we need to find a new role just to find more runway for our goals and aspirations.

3. My life goals no longer aligned with my job

Initially, I was excited about having the opportunity to travel across North America to help build my department and support the company’s aggressive growth plans. The pace was intense but rewarding too and I was fuelled by the impact my team was having on the business. But during my tenure, I got engaged and my fiancé and I started talking about starting a family. And, almost instantly, my priorities shifted. I started envisioning a role with less travel, and more flexibility and control over my schedule. When our life goals change, sometimes we have to realign our work to fit our new vision.

4. Thinking about the future filled me with dread

The final straw for me was when I was at the annual staff holiday party. Instead of enjoying the night and having fun with my colleagues, I felt trapped – like I no longer fit in. I vowed that this would be the last company party I attended. I’ve learned that it’s perfectly normal not to know where you want to be five years from now, but if the thought of another 12 months at your current company makes you want to head for the hills, it’s time to think about what’s next.

We all know, deep down, when it’s time for a career change but that doesn’t make it any easier to make the leap. Most of us do not love making big changes and fear is a big motivator to stay put – as is the fact that we may think we owe it to ourselves to stick it out.

When I spoke with a female leader recently about this very idea, she offered me this wonderful analogy. She described the times in her career where she knew things were not going well and yet she persevered. She said it felt like she was on a building's ledge looking down, perpetually terrified she was going to fall. Her epiphany came one day when she decided to jump off that ledge and make a much-needed change. And when she finally jumped, she landed on a much bigger ledge just below.